A Good Toast Should Make You Cry

The Russian toast is an art form and in my opinion, one of the greatest opportunities to learn about the true nature of my Russian friends and family. The toast starts out often with a little history, or perhaps a loving, awe-inspired description of the person being toasted. The toastmaster reaches into the depths of their soul to say only the kindest, most moving words to elevate and distinguish the person being honored by the toast. Toasts are the measure of a person, their ability to communicate their most honest feelings, and their willingness to publicly declare their love, support, admiration, etc. Toasts are judged by the listeners, and if sufficiently touching, are followed by murmurs of agreement and 'good toast, good toast'. The toast can go on for quite a long time, often evolving into a story or a soliloquy. This is important to know, because when raising glasses in a toast your arm can grow tired, the blood can drain from your hand and you may - in the cases of really long toasts - begin to feel a little panicked the you'll need to put down your glass, thus calling attention to yourself and offending the seriousness of the occasion. I have had this feeling more than once.

As the title of this post suggests, the best toasts surprise and move you to the point of tears. This happened tonight. We went out to dinner to celebrate my father-in-law's birthday. Many toasts were said in his honor, but tonight's winning toast came from my brother-in-law to honor his mother. It was long, epic, and featured a description of his mother as one of Russia's finest, most brilliant scientists, who works hard for her country, whose research is not only important for the advancement of Russia but the whole world, and who, in the face of governmental research funding cuts, deserves protection and the most rigorous defense for her invaluable service. He went on to emphasize that her two lawyer sons are ready to fight for her well-being, and for the social protection of her good colleagues, and that her sons know the real value of her selfless, and endless giving. Needless to say, Mama Lera began to cry, Losha (my brother-in-law) was teary eyed, my stalwart, strong father-in-law looked touched, and even Vanya was impressed by his little brother's emotional range. It was a good family moment -- the kind most often shared over alcohol here. Russians love to show their love, which is why I think they love to drink.